I feel like the majority of my time these days is spent aimlessly looking at Facebook waiting on something interesting to happen or spent "tweeting" in the hope of striking up banter. How depressing is that?
I fucking hate it.
I'm spending most of my time in a flat myself wishing I was back with everyone else having a life. I have the once in a blue moon moment where I can afford to visit people, then I come home and feel sorry for myself as I'm back here. This city is sucking the life from me. I can't walk down the fucking street alone without feeling like I'm having a panic attack. I can't even listen to my iPod when I'm out anymore.
I hate the fact that by me typing this it looks like I'm seeking attention. I hate the fact as well to a point no one will even notice I've wrote this. I just need to rant damnit!
I feel pretty fucking insignificant these days and it's no ones fault and I don't hold any grudges about people not visiting or anything. Hell, I of all people know it costs too much damn money for public transport these days. I'm so bloody lonely :(
I don't even know if I enjoy people visiting me anymore, cause I know within a few days people have to leave and I'm left with that feeling of "right.... what now?!"
Getting drunk is nice. Getting drunk alone is not so nice. But fuck, I need a fucking drink. I intend to finish this bottle, have a good fucking cry then wake up tomorrow at some point, forget everything, then probably stumble across this in a few months and hopefully say "Ach well, least I got over this!" lol.
To sum it up, where the hell did my life go, and can I have it back please?
/rant.
